Well it's a good thing I did that double last week because my body needed a day off yesterday. So instead of going to class on my Monday holiday, I went to the mall! I even bought some new yoga clothes, which I know defeats the purpose of feeling good from the inside-out but whatever, it can't hurt to look good too. I went to the 8pm class and I felt like a new person. I was excited to go to class and right before class I saw my wonderful neighbors and their fabulous dog. I was pretty early because my new routine is to lay down in dead man pose for as long as possible before class. I typically get there when some of the last people from the class before are leaving. So I was feeling great, laying in the dead man pose and then, I started to panic.
Lauren and I are dog-sitting this weekend and I remembered we need to get a copy of the neighbors keys back. All I could think about laying there was what if they went away, we all forgot to get the keys, and poor Foxy is trapped in their house, having to pee and we can't get in to take her out. Does the back door have a security gate? Yes. Does that window upstairs have bars? Shit - I think it does. Could we call the fire department? They get kittens out of trees but I doubt they would break into someone's house for a dog. A locksmith? I could lie and pretend I lived there but they might require some type of verification. Poor Foxy! Alone. Hungry. Scared. Wondering where her caretakers are. Sweet, kind Foxy. Miserable constipated Foxy. In my head I was thinking, I won't forget to get the keys. But crap, what if I do! Damnit. What if I forget and they leave? Then I kept thinking about how I was going to be thinking about this the entire class! Shit shit shit. This was going to ruin my class! Finally, I ran out and looked at the computer to check the time. 7:57. Yes - more than enough time to run upstairs, text them and run back down. Turns out class started a couple minutes late so I even got to lay back down in dead man pose and relax and the panic washed away with each deep breathe. I could practice my yoga knowing that Foxy wouldn't die from starvation because of me. All was right in the world and I ended up having a fantastic class.
I was going way deeper into postures than I usually do. It was like one day off translated into me shocking myself the entire class. I also knew that the instructor tonight had recently lost his mother. Throughout the class, it was as if his grief (real or imagined) fueled me. I wanted to do better not just for me but for him too. I know he must be hurting and it was almost as if I wanted to make him proud, to perhaps give him something. I wanted to squeeze out a little bit of my joy and present it to him like a gift - a little, nicely wrapped gift. I pushed myself even harder for him and felt really good doing it.
I introduced myself after class and told him that he and his family were in my prayers and that I wanted to let him know. He seemed happy to hear me say this. I am sure it didn't hurt that the other person waiting to talk to him wanted something from him. I just wanted to give him my condolences. I walked home feeling like maybe I had left a little piece of my energy with him. I hope he is ok.